By Erin • November 22, 2016
Hello everyone! Hoh-tza-khee to all you! (Good morning!)
I am currently writing this blog entry at a café in Hong Kong. It’s been 4 years since I visited Hong Kong and tasted delicious hakaw and duck rice! I’m so thrilled to discover that they have affordable Hong Kong milktea on the streets!
I am on vacation and I’ve been doing a lot of introspection.
I want to tell you about my French friend Greggy. Yes, he is French, as in he is of French descent in France. No, he does not live in Paris. His family lives in a chateau in a fairytale-like forest. Greggy studied Korean language studies in college. I think he is really interesting. I met him last year in Makati. Nope, he really is just a friend, as in platonic.
Greggy is one of the male friends that I have who are always reminding me to wait for true love. He’s kinda like an “ahya” figure for me (older brother figure). Needless to say, he scolded me a lot because of my illogical love for the Caucasian Man-Child. I always make kwento to Greggy about my new boylaloos or boylets.
I remember Greeggy while I write this because of a story he told me about his Chinese girlfriend (Chinese as in “tay-diok-kah”).
My French friend Greggy met a Chinese woman on a plane from Dublin, Ireland to Beijing, China. He had a wonderful conversation with her on the plane, and they toured around Beijing together. They had a mutual agreement to keep in touch.
From what Greggy shared to me, he’s the more invested one in their relationship. He’s the first one to chat her up (he works in Ireland, and she works in China). He sends her a lot of messages detailing what goes on in his daily transactions. He only gets one-liner replies from her. The Chinese lady went to Europe without telling him.
One of their chat conversations went like this (I copied their chat verbatim. Greggy’s girlfriend has so many grammatical errors though so sorry in advance).
Greggy: I totally understand. Don’t worry. I was just worried you didn’t talk at all.
<Greg sends her food pics, and his selfie. I find it cute when guys do that.>
Greggy’s girlfriend: lots and lots of schedule
Greggy: OK. Even in the evening? Just take 30 seconds before sleep to tell me that. I’m not asking for a journal article, baby.
Greggy’s girlfriend: Yes. And I don’t even wash face last night. (What she meant to say was, “I didn’t even wash my face last night.”)
Greggy: Good luck with crazy schedule. I’m going to office. Miss you. *insert kiss emoticon*
Greggy’s girlfriend: too tired and then go to sleep.
Greggy: I just wanted to know about your trip. I want to know what you did, and things like this because I care for you. But all I get is a “yes.” You totally ignored about what I said about Chinese real estate, for example, and you don’t tell me what you’re doing. That’s why I ask many questions.”
Greggy’s girlfriend: Because I’m very busy. I do not have time to type. Lots and lots of schedule.
It’s all so one-sided to me. I feel sad for him. I asked him why he’s still holding on and preserving the relationship. He’s definitely not happy, and he’s just rubbing salt on his wounds by holding on to something that is not even satisfactory in the first place.
The girl does not want to make it Facebook-official, for one. Now, that says a lot.
Greggy’s answer really jolted me. He said that he met the Chinese lady IN REAL LIFE (IRL). Not online. And that is all the reason he needs to try make it work. He also added, “When I’m in China and we’re physically together, everything’s great. I do not know why she turns into a cold person when we are apart.”
His answer affected so much kasi natamaan ako. My dear readers, I met Chinito Guy over a hookup app. Definitely not Kaysiao. Kaysiao wasn’t invented yet when I swiped right on Chinito Guy one evening as I wait for my taxi ride.
In one of our phone conversations, I asked him if we was willing to lie to my family and friends about how we met.
Back then, I asked Chinito Guy that if the time comes that I will introduce him to my parents, is he willing to lie to protect me? He has to tell EVERYONE that he met me in real life… in a museum or amusement park or cosplay event or whatever… just not over a hookup app online.
Chinito Guy told me, “Yes, I am willing to lie about how we met.” That’s all he said about it. He didn’t protest, and he didn’t question what I wanted. That was all I needed to hear.
Now, as I write this at a café in Hong Kong, tears stream down my face as I recall the memory. Chinito Guy is no longer in my life. I wonder if there would be another guy who will tell me “I’m willing to lie about how we met,” in a heartbeat.